Like I Loved You
by BTRobsession
Summary: A/U. Kames/ Kogan. Kendall didn't understand what went wrong between them. He thought James was the one, but Kendall quickly realizes that he was wrong. Then a new kid moves across the street and Kendall finds himself falling for him. Now Kendall must decide if it's worth fighting for James, or starting something new.
1. Heartless

**A/N: I guess I shouldn't be starting a new story, but I hate holding all these ideas in my head! I was going to post it after Find A Way, but I figured since it is almost over that I will just post it now. I feel like I haven't been writing Kogan that much, so this story is going to be centered around them. I hope you guys like it!**

Green eyes shot open and an annoyed groan left the blond teenager's lips when his alarm went off. Kendall Knight rolled over and lazily reached for his cellphone that sat on the nightstand beside his bed, grasping it in his fingers and pressing the snooze button.

He hated Mondays.

Mondays meant that the weekend was over and it was back to another long week of school. Kendall didn't mind school, he had friends and a couple of his teachers were pretty cool, but the homework and getting up early weren't the things he enjoyed. He wasn't a morning person to begin with.

The annoying buzzing went off and Kendall placed the phone back down, then he rolled over to catch another fifteen minutes of sleep. He pulled his black comforter up to his chin and let his eyes flutter shut.

"Kendall!" His mother's voice rang from the other side of his bedroom door, followed by loud hits to the wood.

The blond cursed to himself and tried to tune her out. The door opened and his eyes flew open, another groan leaving his lips.

"Kendall, it's time to get up," Jennifer Knight told her son.

"Just five more minutes," Kendall begged and he buried his face into his pillow.

"I told you not to stay up late."

Kendall wanted to deny that he hadn't stayed up so late, but he knew his mother would see right through his lie. Instead he huffed in annoyance and tossed the comforter off himself and sat up, mustering up the dirtiest look he could.

"Don't look at me that way." Jennifer placed her hands on her hips and Kendall's expression quickly changed. "Good. Now get ready."

The red-haired woman left the room and Kendall rolled his eyes. He reached over and picked up his phone again, quickly canceling the alarm before it went off a second time, then he checked his Facebook page. He accepted a few friend requests and scrolled through his friends' posts, quickly growing bored and exiting out of the browser.

He opened his messages and sent a text to his boyfriend, a smile appearing on his face at the thought of James. He knew James wouldn't respond right away and he placed his phone back down, then he crawled out of bed to get dressed.

Breakfast was waiting for him when he got downstairs and his stomach growled when the smell bacon reached his nose. Kendall entered the kitchen and ruffled his sister's hair, the small girl rolling her eyes and trying to swat her older brother away. Kendall just chuckled.

"Kendall, can you do me a favor?" Jennifer asked her son and he nodded his head. "I need you to pick Katie up after school? I promised Bridgette I would cover her evening shift."

Kendall groaned. "But I was going to see James later."

"I know and I'm sorry, but I have to work tonight. Just have James come over."

The teenager rolled his eyes and he let out a sad sigh. "Yeah, I guess."

"Thank you, sweetie. I should be home at around ten. That means you two should be in bed by that time. No more staying up late." Jennifer made sure to glance at her eldest child.

"I wasn't up that late," Kendall lied.

"Oh please! I heard you talking to James," Katie said.

"Hey!"

"Enough." Jennifer warned and the Knight children instantly grew silent.

Kendall glared at his sister and the brunette girl stuck her tongue out at him.

****BTR****BTR****BTR****BTR

Kendall let a sad sigh escape his lips when his eyes landed on the high school in front of him. All he wanted to do was turn around and go home, but if his mother found out that he had ditched school, it would just result in another grounding. That was the last thing Kendall wanted.

He adjusted the strap of his backpack, then he made his way toward the building. The hallways were loud and rowdy, but it wasn't anything new to the blond. He rolled his eyes at his fellow classmates and continued down the hall until he was at his locker.

Kendall unzipped his bag and began placing the items he didn't need into his locker. He heard someone approach him and he glanced up, finding his best friend.

"Hey!" Carlos greeted and Kendall couldn't help but be annoyed with how cheerful his friend was being.

"How can you be so happy?" Kendall asked and he shut his locker. "It's Monday!"

"Yes, but I still get to see you and we have hockey practice later. What's there not to be happy about?"

"Okay, I get it."

"Why are you so grumpy?" Carlos questioned.

Kendall shrugged his backpack over his shoulder. "It's nothing," he replied.

Carlos wasn't buying it. "Liar. Did you get grounded again?"

"No! But I will be once my mom finds out what I did."

"What did you do exactly?"

"Uh...I don't really want to talk about it," Kendall quickly replied and he turned to leave, only for Carlos to reach out and grab his shoulder. The blond sighed and turned back around.

"I tell you stuff all the time." Carlos pouted.

"This is...personal."

Carlos rolled his eyes. "I've told you personal things before. I don't get why you won't tell me."

"I just hung out with James."

"So? He's your boy-oh! Kendall, you slept with him!"

"Shh!" Kendall cried and he threw his hand over the shorter boy's mouth.

Carlos wiggled free and he stared up at Kendall with large eyes. "You did!"

"Will you shut up! It just happened!"

"I thought you said you weren't ready for that crap?"'

"I'm not...I wasn't. I don't know. We love each other ya know?"

Carlos shook his head, still not comprehending what was being said to him. Kendall rolled his eyes when he realized that Carlos wasn't grasping it. "Never mind," he muttered.

"Does your mom know?" Carlos asked.

"No and she's not gonna. She would kill me!"

"Okay then why are you so grumpy? You got some, shouldn't you be happy?"

"He hasn't said anything, not one word and it's making me think I did something wrong," Kendall replied.

"Hmm maybe he's busy or something. Have you seen him?" Carlos asked. Kendall shook his head and Carlos gave him a shove forward. "Then go find him!"

"I'll catch up with you later," Kendall said, then he turned away and made his way down the hall.

It was getting closer to the first bell and the hallway was getting crowded. Kendall pushed through different groups of people, ignoring the annoyed looks they shot his way. James' locker was on the other end of the hall, but when Kendall reached it, his boyfriend was no where in sight. He let out a sigh and decided to wait for him.

It felt like an eternity before Kendall spotted James coming toward him. The blond felt his heart leap at the sight of his boyfriend and a smile quickly appeared over his face, but it quickly faltered when James didn't return the friendly gesture.

"You okay?" Kendall asked once James was at his locker.

The brunet boy nodded his head and began messing with the combination lock. The vibe between them felt off and Kendall frowned. Something was wrong.

"James, you seem-"

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not. You've been ignoring me."

James cursed under his breath when he missed the correct number on the lock. Kendall's frustration was growing by the minute and he wanted to know what the hell was wrong with his boyfriend. They had been fine over the weekend.

"James?" Kendall asked again, now starting to worry. Maybe he did do something.

The brunet finally had his locker open and he emptied his belongings into it, then he shut it and gave his attention to the confused blond in front of him. Kendall tried reading him, but couldn't figure out what James was thinking.

"Can we talk?" James asked.

"Okay, what's-"

"No," James interrupted. "Not here."

Kendall's brows scrunched up in confusion and he found himself nodding his head. James took his hand and led him away. They were outside now and James kept leading him away until they were behind the school.

"James, what are you doing?" Kendall quickly yanked his hand away and the brunet turned around to face him.

"I think we need to take a break," James replied.

"A break? But why?"

"Kendall, I love you, I really do, but...but I think we should split up for a while."

"I don't understand. Why? Did I do something?" Kendall asked.

"No! I just feel like something is different between us," James answered.

"This about the other night, isn't it?"

James nodded his head. "It was great! Really, it was, but...I think we rushed things. Let's just take a break and figure out what we want."

"I know what I want. I thought you knew what you wanted."

"Kendall, I'm really sorry."

"Forget it."

Kendall turned away when he felt tears gather in his eyes and he didn't want James to see that he was hurt. He made his way back to the school and quickly wiped his eyes when he set foot through the entrance. The hall was starting to clear out and Kendall heard the second bell, but he didn't care that he was late for class. He didn't care about anything.

****BTR****BTR****BTR****BTR

The day was finally over and Kendall couldn't wait to go home and be alone. Carlos had been asking him what was wrong, but the blond just replied with "nothing or "don't worry about it". But Carlos was going to worry about it. He had never seen his best friend so upset, and it wasn't like Kendall to just shut him out. The blond hadn't done that in years.

Carlos wasn't the only one who noticed Kendall's odd behavior. As soon as Katie climbed into her brother's car, she instantly picked up on the negative vibe her brother was giving off. She questioned him about it, but again, Kendall ignored her.

Kendall was glad that his mother was working late that night, she would just question him and that was the last thing he needed. He didn't want to tell his mom that James had dumped him because they slept together. He would be grounded for life.

The blond teen didn't understand why this happened. They were doing good, at least, he thought they were. They met back in middle school and they both played on the hockey team, but it wasn't until the end of their freshman year in high school did they become more than friends. They became one of the most popular couples in the school; they were both jocks and James had always been popular for his good looks.

They were happy, but now Kendall was wondering if he was the only happy one in the relationship.

He never wanted to sleep with James; at least, not yet anyway. He felt like they needed more time to grow and he wanted to make sure that James was that special person. Kendall hated the fact that he broke that important promise to himself. He thought James was it; his soulmate, but he couldn't be more wrong.

He didn't understand how James could be so heartless.

The following day was hell. It was torture walking through the halls and seeing James. Things were very different now. Kendall couldn't go over to James anymore and greet him with a kiss like he used to do. The blond caught his ex staring at him from time to time, but James quickly turned away and acted like Kendall wasn't even there.

It hurt.

A sad sigh escaped Kendall's lips and he slammed the door to locker harshly. He wanted to hate James; hate him for hurting him, for making him feel like he never meant anything, but the strong feelings Kendall felt toward the brunet wasn't anywhere near hate. He loved him. And he didn't know why.

"Hey!"

Kendall turned away from his locker at the familiar voice and he forced a smile. "Hey," he greeted.

Carlos frowned. "Okay, what's up with you?"

"Nothing."

"Obviously not. Dude, you missed hockey practice!"

"James was there."

"Yeah so?" Then it clicked. "Oh...did you guys..."

Kendall nodded his head sadly. Carlos opened his mouth to say something, and Kendall quickly interrupted him. "Don't say anything. It's fine."

"Is it? You looked bummed," Carlos said.

Kendall just shrugged. "I'll live."

Carlos didn't really believe what his best friend was telling him, but he decided to let it go and change the subject. Kendall was stubborn and it was going to take a lot to get him to talk about what he was feeling.

It felt like the day was dragging and Kendall found himself glancing up at the clock above his Math teacher's desk every few seconds. He couldn't focus on the lesson Mr. Norton was going over and he kept his eyes glued to the open textbook in front of him.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the bell rang. Kendall was quick to gather his things and he bolted for the door. He didn't even bother to wait for Carlos, he grabbed his History textbook from his locker and disappeared from the school.

His mother was home when he arrived and he let out a sigh. He knew he had to pretend that he was happy or else she was going to bombard him with questions until he came clean. He reached over and grabbed his backpack from the passenger seat, then he climbed out of the car.

The sound of voices reached his ears and he turned around, his eyes landing on the house across from his own. A new family was currently moving their belongings in. Kendall wondered if the family had any kids and if they were around his age. He loved having Carlos as a friend, but it would be nice to add a third person.

Kendall felt a like a weirdo for watching them, but he was curious. No one had lived in that house for years and it seemed like it was going to be uninhabited for ever.

The blond was growing bored and he decided it was best to get inside before his mother worried. He was about to leave, but he stopped when his eyes landed on a young brunet boy. He seemed to be around his age and Kendall's interest peaked. The boy was struggling with some boxes and Kendall took this as the opportunity to meet the kid.

Kendall adjusted his bag, then he walked across the street, his pace picking up when the boy dropped the box he was carrying.

"Hey! Do you need help?" Kendall asked.

The boy froze and his brown eyes landed on the box, then back up at the blond in front of him. He let out a sigh of defeat. "Yeah. Thanks," he replied.

"No problem." Kendall smiled and he reached down to grasp the box, a small groan leaving his lips when he realized how heavy it was. "What's in here! Bricks!"

"No, books."

Kendall dropped the box and he quickly sent his new neighbor an apologetic look.

"Here," The boy said and he reached for the box. "I bet the two of us can get it."

"What's your name?" Kendall asked.

"Logan. Yours?"

"Kendall."

Logan nodded. "It's cool that we're neighbors. I was afraid that there wasn't going to be anyone my age."

"I was thinking the same thing. Maybe we can hang out sometime?" Kendall suggested.

The blond wasn't sure what was going on, but he felt his stomach doing flips. He wasn't really the nervous type, but Logan was making him feel...different. Logan smiled and Kendall quickly noticed the dimples on the boy's cheeks. Logan was actually pretty cute.

The two managed to get the box to Logan's house and the brunet thanked Kendall multiple times for helping him. Kendall helped take a few more boxes, then he waved goodbye to Logan and crossed the street back to his house.

For the first time in days, Kendall wasn't thinking about James anymore. He wasn't thinking about what he did wrong and what he could have done to keep James around. No, instead, he was thinking about the cute boy next door.

 **A/N: So that was the first chapter! What did you guys think! I know James is a jerk, but at least Logan entered the picture and maybe he will become Kendall's best friend...or more? Who knows! Anyway, I will update soon!**


	2. How Not To

**A/N: Thank you guys so much for the wonderful feedback! I apologize for the late update and I appreciate everyone being patient with me. I hope you all like this chapter!**

Just as Kendall predicted, his mother began asking questions the minute he stepped foot through the door. The teen couldn't help but roll his eyes, which ended up landing him in another lecture about respect.

He understood why his mother was so overprotective, she had always been that way, and when his father passed away, it made her worse. Kendall let her know multiple times that she was doing just fine raising him and his sister, but even that didn't help her worry less. It was hard for her to be both parents and Kendall hated seeing his mother so stressed out. She told her children that she was okay, but the Kendall could see right through her act.

Kendall just wanted her to take it down a notch. He wasn't a little kid anymore and he didn't need her to watch out for him all the time. He wanted to stay out a little later past curfew or not have to come home being questioned about his whearabouts. Kendall wasn't a bad kid; he went to school and did his best; he didn't do drugs or vandalize the town like a few of his peers did. Yet his mother still didn't trust him.

"Mom, I didn't do anything. I'm home, aren't I?" Kendall told his mother.

Jennifer Knight set down the cutting knife and laid it on the counter, then she turned to her son. "Kendall, you need to lose the attitude. I was just asking a question," she said.

"You always ask questions! I went to school and now I'm here. I was just helping out the new neighbors."

"And that's very sweet, honey, but you should have called or-"

"Oh my God! I was right there!" Kendall cried, gesturing toward the house across the street.

"Kendall Donald Knight, you do not raise your voice at me," Jennifer said sternly.

Kendall let out a heavy sigh. "Forget it."

"Honey, I'm sorry but I worry and-"

"Well stop. I'm fine."

Kendall turned on his heel and left the kitchen. Jennifer leaned back against the counter and pinched the bridge of her nose. She knew how teenagers could be, she was one herself once upon a time, and now she knew how her parents must have felt whenever she had given them attitude. It was strange for her oldest child to act out, it was usually Katie doing things that raised her blood pressure. Something was going on with her son.

Jennifer gathered the cut up vegetables from the cutting board and tossed them in the crock pot, then she left the kitchen and made her way up the stairs. She passed by Katie's room, sending her youngest a smile before making her way down the hall toward Kendall's room. She knocked gently.

"Kendall? Sweetheart, can you open the door?" she asked softly.

It took a minute for her son to open the door and she was thankful he did. She smiled softly at him, only for it to falter when he didn't return the gesture. She sighed.

"Honey, can we talk for a bit?"

Kendall shrugged slightly. "I guess."

Jennifer entered the room and she shut the door to give them some privacy. Kendall plopped down on his bed and his mother took a seat next to him.

"I'm sorry for upsetting you. I just worry when you're not home on time," Jennifer said.

"I know, but I'm a not a little kid. I wasn't even doing anything wrong," Kendall said.

"I know. I trust you."

Kendall scoffed. "Do you? I can't even stay out late without you freaking out."

"I just worry about you. The last time someone I loved was out late, they never returned."

Kendall hated talking about his father. It wasn't that he didn't love him, but it was a very touchy subject in the Knight house. Katie was too young to remember him, but Kendall was old enough recall all the memories he had with his father. His mind was a little fuzzy, but the memory that was as clear as day was when his father was teaching him how to shoot a hockey puck. The whole reason Kendall loved hockey was all because of his dad.

It was hard to talk about him and it made Kendall's heart ache to see his mother still so upset after ten years. Kendall didn't remember much about the night when his father never returned from work. He just remembered standing in the hall listening to his mother's cries. He didn't understand why she was so upset. The only thing he knew was that his daddy wasn't coming home.

The pain of losing his father was still there, but he tried to not let him bother him anymore. He knew his dad was in a better place and he was watching over his family. It brought Kendall peace and he thought it had done the same for his mother, but it was obvious that she was still struggling to cope with his death.

"Mom, that's not going to happen to me," Kendall assured his mother.

Jennifer nodded her head, her eyes sparkling with tears. "I know. I'm sorry if it feels like I'm suffocating you. I would just never forgive myself if something happened to you or Katie."

"We're fine, mom. You do a great job. I just wish you would tone it down."

Jennifer chuckled. "I could be worse. Carlos' dad is a cop."

"True."

"Okay, I hear you loud and clear. I will tone it down."

"So I can stay out late?" Kendall asked.

"Nice try," Jennifer replied and her son frowned. "The last thing I need is you falling behind in school because you're falling asleep in class. You stayed out late with James the other night. I think he will understand."

Just hearing his ex's name brought Kendall's mood down. It must have shown on his face because his mother was reaching out to comfort him.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Jennifer asked.

"Nothing," Kendall replied, his gloomy tone giving him away.

"Did something happen with you and James?"

 _Yes_ Kendall thought. He shook his head. "No."

Jennifer eyed her son. She knew when he was lying. "Kendall, tell me what happened."

"I think they broke up," Katie said and both of the older Knights looked up to find her standing in the doorway, neither one of them having heard her come in.

Jennifer let out a sigh. "Katie, I had the door closed for a reason."

"But they broke up. I'm sure of it."

Kendall grabbed one of his pillows and tossed it at his sibling. "Katie, shut up!"

Katie quickly used the door to dodge the attack, then she poked her head back into her brother's room. "Missed me!"

Kendall went to grab another pillow and Jennifer quickly stepped in. "That is enough! Katie, go downstairs so I can talk to your brother."

"Okay," Katie said and she stuck her tongue out at her brother, then she closed the door.

Jennifer turned her attention back to her son. "Honey, did you two really break up?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Kendall replied.

"Kendall, it's okay to be upset. I know you loved James, but he just wasn't the right person for you. Someone better will come along when you're not looking."

Kendall didn't really think so, but he nodded his head anyway. His mother stood up and leaned down to kiss his head, then she left the bedroom. The blond wanted to believe what his mother had said, but he just couldn't do it. He loved James and it was hard to picture being with anyone else.

His mind wandered to his new neighbor and he stood up to glance out the window. The moving truck was pulling away and he caught a glimpse of Logan entering the house with who he assumed was Logan's mother.

The blond felt his heart skip a beat at the sight of the brunet. Logan seemed really nice and on top of that he was pretty cute. But Kendall didn't know him yet and knowing his luck Logan wouldn't be into him. It was wishful thinking.

But Kendall wasn't looking for anyone right now. He was still trying to get over James. It was going to take time until the pain he felt was gone for good.

****BTR****BTR****BTR****BTR

To say things were awkward between James and Kendall would be an understatement. James was avoiding Kendall like the plague and the blond didn't understand why. He knew it was going to be difficult to go around school without James by his side, but it seemed like his ex was making things worse.

The long stares in the hall between classes was becoming too much for Kendall. He found himself wanting to stroll over to James and talk to him, but deep down he knew he couldn't do that. They weren't together anymore and it seemed like their friendship died the same day their relationship did.

Hockey practice was worse. Kendall didn't understand why James still played on the team. Kendall was the captain and playing on the same team as his ex was becoming a challenge. The two never said a word to each other and James always had his eyes elsewhere when Kendall gave his speeches.

It was awful and sometimes Kendall found himself just wanting to kick James off the team, but he never followed through. James was a good player and it would just hurt the team. But it hurt Kendall when he had to play and pretend that he never knew James.

The only thing Kendall could do was try not to think about James anymore and push through the pain he was feeling. It was easier said than done.

"Wow, you guys really are through, huh?" Carlos asked.

They were currently walking through the hall toward their next class. Kendall was tired of being asked about his personal life. He didn't have a problem with Carlos, it was more with the other kids that bugged him about the situation with James. He knew people were going to start asking, but he didn't think it would be so soon. But he should have known better. Rumors spread like wild fire.

"Yep," Kendall replied.

Carlos frowned. "Why are you mad at me?"

Kendall sighed. "It's not you. I'm just tired of everyone else. Is James telling them something?"

Carlos shrugged. "Who knows. But you know how this place can be. People are bored with their own lives so they try to interfere with someone else's. Just ignore them."

"I am. It's just annoying. They need to mind their own business."

"It will die down eventually."

"I hope so."

"Are you doing okay, though?" Carlos asked.

Kendall knew there was no point in lying. He shook his head. "I feel terrible."

"This really sucks. I'm sorry he was such a dick. Do you want me to kick his ass?"

"No, it's okay. I just need to get over him."

"You will."

"It's hard. I just don't know how not to think about him."

Carlos let out a sad sigh and he patted his friend on the shoulder. "You will, buddy. It just takes time."

Kendall was tired of hearing that, but Carlos was right. Time was all he really needed, but it was difficult to stop thinking about James. The brunet was always on his mind and it was frustrating because all Kendall wanted to do was let go.

At least, he thought he did.

He wasn't sure what he wanted. He didn't want to think about James anymore and he wanted to be happy again, but at the same time he wanted to be back with James, to be wrapped in his arms. James had made him happy.

"Dude, you'll get through this. James was a jerk and you're gonna realize that," Carlos said.

Kendall wasn't paying attention anymore. Something caught his eye, or more like someone. He recognized the dark hair and light skin, the dimples he thought were adorable. But it wasn't possible.

"I have to go," Kendall said.

"Go where?" Carlos asked. "We have the same class."

"I'll catch up with you later."

Carlos was confused, but he nodded his head anyway. Kendall made his way down the hall toward the familiar person. The brunet was standing by the lockers, trying to get his open. Kendall slowly approached him, not knowing what he was going to say.

"That locker gets stuck easy."

The boy jumped and spun around, his body relaxing once he recognized the person. "Oh hey! Kendall right?"

The blond nodded, a smile forming over his face. "Glad you remembered me."

"How could I forget?"

Kendall shrugged and stepped closer to Logan. He reached out and banged on the locker door a couple of times, then it swung open.

"You just have to mess with it," he said.

"Wow. First you help me move in and now you fix my locker. Maybe you can help me find my first class," Logan chuckled.

"Probably. What do you have?"

"AP Chemistry."

"What? Are you like a genius or something?" Kendall questioned.

Logan gave a little shrug. "I guess you could say that."

"Well alright then. Yeah, I can show you."

"Thanks! It's funny that we're neighbors and we go to the same school. Is it a coincidence or is this town just that small?" Logan asked.

"The town is just that small," Kendall replied with a chuckle.

"I need to get used to it I guess."

"If you want I can show you around one of these days? There's not much to see, but it could be fun."

Logan nodded his head, his adorable dimples showing when he smiled. "Sure. It could be fun."

"Great!" Kendall cried, almost too enthusiastically.

The first bell rang and students began making their way to class, others still goofing off.

"Are you going to show me or not?" Logan asked.

"Huh? Oh! Yeah of course! Right this way," Kendall gestured down the hall and Logan chuckled.

 **A/N: I didn't know how to end it and I have to go to bed so...that's why it ended like this. I hope you guys liked it anyway! So one more thing before I go. I did decide to use song titles for the chapter titles since this whole story idea is actually from a song I was listening to. Just wanted to point that out. Anyway! I will update soon!**


	3. Break Up In A Small Town

Kendall knew he was going to receive a lecture the minute he heard the second bell. The halls were beginning to empty and Kendall started to move quickly, wanting to avoid the talk with his English teacher. The last thing he needed was for his mother to get a call about his attendance.

It was awkward the minute he stepped foot through the door of Mrs. Peterson's class. The fifteen students that she had all sent stares in Kendall's direction. The blond was never late to class, well that wasn't entirely true, he had been tardy more than once, but it had gone unnoticed in his other classes due to a high volume of students. This class, however, was his smallest and nothing ever went unnoticed.

"Is there a reason why you're late?" Mrs. Peterson questioned.

Kendall shook his head. "No, ma'am."

"Good. Now take a seat."

Kendall made his way toward the back of the class to his assigned desk, doing his best to ignore the snickering from some of his fellow classmates. He set his backpack down on the floor and leaned back in the chair, a heavy sigh escaping his lips. He hated his first period class; he sucked at writing essays and the books he had to read were boring. It also didn't help that he didn't have Carlos.

He recognized some of the kids in his class, but they weren't really anyone he talked to. He may have said a few words to some of them in the halls, but other than that he really didn't consider them friends. His clique was different. He was a jock.

Was.

Kendall let out a sigh when he realized that he probably wasn't going to be a part of that group anymore. Now that he and James were no longer an item, it was a sure thing that he was going to get kicked out. There was only room for one and it wasn't him.

Kendall snapped himself from his thoughts when he realized everyone had their eyes on him. He glanced up to find his teacher staring at him, her eyes narrowing behind her glasses.

"Kendall, pay attention," she said sternly.

The blond nodded his head. "Sorry," he muttered.

A few of his classmates giggled and he felt his face heat up in embarrassment. He tried to focus on the lecture that was being given, but all he could think about was James. The brunet wasn't easy to forget.

Relief washed over the blond when the bell finally rang. He quickly gathered his things and left the classroom, not caring if he bumped a few people out of the way. He felt eyes on him the minute he reached his locker and he glanced up to find James staring at him, their eyes locking for a moment before Kendall forced himself to look away.

He could still feel James' eyes burning into him and he look toward the brunet's direction again, quickly regretting doing so when he started to make his way over. Kendall turned away and slammed his locker, ready to disappear in the crowd of students, but he wasn't quick enough.

"Hey."

Kendall quietly cursed to himself and turned around, finding James beside him. His head was screaming at him to just ignore his ex and walk away, but he found himself greeting James anyway.

"Hey."

"Listen, can we talk for a bit?" James asked.

"Why? The last time we talked you broke up with me," Kendall replied, not caring if his tone was harsh.

"I know and I'm sorry."

Kendall scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Yeah right. I have to go."

"Kendall," James pleaded and he reached out, his hand grasping the blond's shoulder. "I just want to talk. Please?"

The blond wanted to walk away and never speak to James again, but yet he wasn't moving. He was frozen in place while his mind screamed at him to just leave. Maybe James just waned to apologize.

"Fine," Kendall finally said.

They didn't go outside like the last time; instead Kendall followed James to the gym. It was empty, the next P.E. class not in session yet and they made their way toward the bleachers. James set his backpack down, then he took a seat. Kendall didn't feel like sitting, and instead he stood in front of the brunet with his arms crossed.

"Kendall, I know you probably hate me but-"

"Yeah I do."

It was a lie. Kendall didn't hate him. For some stupid and unknown reason he still loved the jerk that broke his heart. He tried to just forget about James and move on like a normal person, but he couldn't.

"I really am sorry for the other day. I just don't think we have those feelings for each other anymore," James said.

"You're joking? It seemed like you did that night," Kendall said.

James sighed. "I still love you, but I think it's best if we just stay friends. We can still hang out and-"

"Hang out? Why would I hang out with you?"

"I want to be your friend and if you happen to meet someone else, then I'm okay with it. You would be okay with me seeing someone else right?" James questioned.

"I...I don't know. No. No I would not be okay with it. I still love you and I thought you dragged me in here to work things out," Kendall replied.

"I just can't. We can still be friends and-"

"Enough with that already! I don't want to be friends."

James nodded his head and stood up, grabbing his backpack and slipping one of the straps over his shoulder. "If that's how you feel then okay," he said.

Kendall felt hot tears gather in his eyes and he forced himself to hold them back until James was gone. The bell rang and kids began to gather in the gym for their next class. The tears started to roll down his face and Kendall quickly wiped them away before anyone noticed.

He made his way toward the exit, trying to push through the people who were trying to get in. He felt another body collide with his and he glanced up to apologize, his eyes connecting with dark brown ones.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-"

Logan laughed. "We've been bumping into each other a lot lately."

"Sorry. I was just leaving," Kendall said.

"Can I go with you? I hate this class."

"I don't think you want to go with me. My next class is boring."

"And so is this one."

Kendall felt someone else bump into him and he let out a frustrated sigh. "I seriously need to get out of here."

Logan nodded his head in agreement and he grabbed Kendall's hand, sending fireworks through the blond's body. He let Logan drag him out of the gym and back to the hallway.

"Are we ditching now?' Kendall asked.

"No, that would be stupid. I didn't want someone else to run into you," Logan replied.

"Thanks. You'll get used to it."

"I hope so. This school is just...different. I don't know."

"If you need help navigating I can definitely show you. "

Logan smiled. "Thanks."

The second bell rang and Kendall let out a sigh. He was not looking forward to his next class and if he could, he would spend the whole period chatting with Logan in the empty halls. But life wasn't fair.

"I guess I better get in there," Logan said.

Kendall nodded. "Yeah. Maybe I will see you later."

Logan chuckled. "You probably will. I live across from you."

Kendall blushed. "Yeah that's what I meant. Um see you later I guess."

He didn't know why he felt so nervous around Logan. Every time they met up with each other, he always felt butterflies and he never felt that way before. Maybe he did once upon a time. When he was with James, he felt those same butterflies and fireworks, but this time around was different. Was he falling for Logan?

Kendall shook his head at that thought. He still loved James and a part of him thought maybe they would get back together. They were together for so long that Kendall thought they would last forever. He couldn't really say that now, but there was still hope.

****BTR****BTR****BTR****BTR

"Please! Please!" Carlos begged for what felt like the hundredth time. He was clasping his hands together and trying to do his best puppy dog eyes.

Kendall only shook his head, which only resulted in his best friend begging harder. It was so tempting to just give in, but Kendall didn't want to. He didn't want to go to some stupid party.

"No."

"Oh come on! It will be fun!"

"I highly doubt that."

"Everyone will be there!"

"Yeah everyone which means James. I don't want to see him," Kendall said.

"Maybe he won't go? Kendall, this is perfect for you! You can have fun and maybe meet someone else!" Carlos exclaimed.

Kendall rolled his eyes and tossed his Xbox controller, giving up on the game that they were supposed to be playing. "Carlos, I don't feel like going. It's going to be weird now that everyone knows," he said.

"I doubt anyone cares! The last party we went to was...was...see! I can't even remember! We need to go!"

"I don't think my mom will let me go. She's been weird lately."

"Then you sneak out."

Kendall eyed his friend. "You do remember that you're dad is a cop, right?"

Carlos rolled his eyes. "So? I sneak out all the time."

"Sure you do."

"Please? I promise it will be fun. If it sucks we can leave, but lets at least give it a chance."

"Who's throwing this party anyway?" Kendall asked.

"Guitar Dude," Carlos replied.

"Oh great. Everyone is going to be getting high."

Carlos frowned. "He doesn't do drugs. Does he?"

"Carlos, I know you want to go but I just don't feel like going anywhere. I'd rather stay in and we play video games or something."

"Hmf!" Carlos sat back against the couch and crossed his arms over his chest.

"That doesn't work."

Carlos ignored the blond and continued to pout. Kendall rolled his eyes and stood up. "I'm getting something to drink. Do you want anything?" he asked.

He continued to be ignored and he rolled his eyes again. Katie was in the kitchen doing her homework when Kendall entered the kitchen and he walked over to the fridge, opening the door and reaching for a couple of sodas.

"You should go to that party," Katie piped up.

Kendall turned toward his sister. "Seriously? You were eavesdropping?"

Katie shrugged. "The point is, you should go. You've been so down in the dumps lately."

"I don't expect you to understand."

"You're right, I don't understand teen love, but it obviously sucks because all you do is mope around all day."

"Not true."

"Mom thinks you need help."

"Katie, shut up. I'm fine."

"I'll cover for you so you can go. Mom will probably be at work anyway," Katie said.

"And where are you supposed to go? You can't stay here by yourself," Kendall said.

"I can go to Gaby's house."

"What am I supposed to tell mom? She won't let me go anywhere."

"Say you're staying with me." The Knight siblings glanced over to find Carlos standing in the room. Kendall rolled his eyes.

"No, I'm not going," Kendall said.

"Just say we have a project to work on," Carlos said.

"And what do we tell your parents?" Kendall asked.

"Don't worry about it."

Kendall wanted to protest, but he knew it was just going to result in Carlos begging like a little kid again. He sighed in defeat. "Fine."

"Yes!" Carlos cheered. "Don't worry, buddy. It's going to be great!"

****BTR****BTR****BTR****BTR

Carlos was a liar. He promised the party was going to be great, and he couldn't have been more wrong. Kendall was sure he was just being pessimistic, but he couldn't help it. He didn't want to come to this stupid party in the first place and he was starting to regret letting Carlos drag him to it.

The house was packed with what Kendall could only assume was the whole school, or at least a good chunk of it. He recognized a few people, but they weren't really people he associated with. At least James wasn't here.

Carlos was having a good time chatting with people or dancing along to the music. Kendall tried to let loose like his friend, but it was going to take more than good music to do so.

"You need a drink!"

"What?"

"I said you need a drink!" Carlos repeated, trying to raise his voice a little louder so that Kendall could hear it over the music.

Kendall shook his head, not wanting to get wasted. He had to go home later and the last thing he needed was his mother finding out that he was drunk.

Carlos grabbed Kendall by the hand and dragged the blond toward the kitchen. It was a little quieter in that room and they were able to hear each other. Carlos grabbed a red solo cup and shoved it in Kendall's hand.

"What's in this?" Kendall asked and he glanced down at the red liquid.

Carlos shrugged and he grabbed a cup for himself, taking a rather large drink. He grimaced at the strong taste. "I think it's vodka," he replied.

"Carlos, I don't want to drink."

"It will make you feel better."

"I doubt it."

"It's not that bad," Carlos said and he tried another sip.

"That's not what I'm worried about. I can't get drunk tonight."

"You might want to."

"Why?"

Kendall got his answer when he spotted a familiar face in the crowd of people, and his heart sunk. He had a feeling he would see James tonight; James loved a good party every now and then, but Kendall wasn't expecting to see James with someone else.

"He came with Mercedes?" Kendall asked. It felt like his heart shattered into a million little pieces. He didn't think James would move on so quickly.

"Maybe they are just friends?" Carlos said.

It was obvious that they were more than just friends. She was wrapped around his arm and his around her waist. It hurt to see them together.

"Hey, don't be upset. You can find someone too!" Carlos said.

"I didn't think he would really show up. How did he even know?" Kendall asked.

Carlos shrugged. "Maybe someone told him."

Kendall took a large drink of the punch, not caring about the strong aftertaste that it left in his mouth. He no longer cared about getting wasted and he drowned the rest of the drink, ready to fill his cup with more

Of course James would be at the same party as him. Kendall knew he was going to see him wherever he went, he would never be able to move on. But that's what happens when you break up in a small town.

 **A/N: Sorry again for the late update. I'm glad I was able to finish this. It's taken a lot of willpower to sit down and type it. I made a playlist of all the songs that I'm basing the chapters off of and that's kind of helped. Well, anyway, James is still a jerk and Kendall needs to forget about him. Don't worry, Kogan will happen! Thank you for reading!**


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